Carnal Cardio

Sex burns more calories than any other activity (Especially if partners not willing), yet the place people go to get in shape, the gym, doesn't offer any classes or activity rooms to do it. This is bullshit! Im paying $10 a month (that's a pack of cigarettes!!) to run in place 3x a week, I expect top of the line conditioning! The penis is a muscle too! I should be able to pump after I get a pump! Adult Playtime should be a service offered with Black Card Membership. I even have a name for it, Sex-Ex! Screw tanning beds! I want sofa beds! They should supply the women, too. Personal trainers have alot of downtime, why not make them earn their paycheck by giving my other appendage a private training session? Id pay the extra $10 for that! I wouldnt even care that half their cardio machines are broken.